Thursday, October 12, 2006

Lazy parents

This really riles me up. Not this specific article, but everything about it, everything it relates to.

It just stinks of the slopey-shoulder syndrome society is plagued by these days. Oh, let's not give out to the fucking moron parents who let their kids play adult-rated video games for fourteen hours a day, let's blame the faceless gaming industry who makes the games and provides good old-fashioned fun to the vast majority of normal, sensible people. Yeah.

What the fuck happened to personal responsibility? I appreciate that I'm not the first person to go off on one about this; the issue has been dissected far more eloquently by many others. I couldn't help it, though. I had to post about it.

It's just become so ingrained in our culture:

Parents: Wow, I would never have expected little Davie to go crazy, despite the fact that we used to beat him and lock him in the cupboard as a child, and he grew up watching violent Japanese horror, looking at porn and playing GTA at the age of nine, while at weekends he helped Daddy polish his gun collection. Shrug. It's nothing to do with us. Society made him who he is.

Little Davie: I can't be held responsible, look how bad my childhood was.

I am not for one second condoning that the way one is raised gives a legitimacy to the way one behaves - if everyone who had a shite childhood decided to go on a killing spree, we'd all be dead - but I do think it stems from a lack of something, something the parents have failed on. However, it's easier to sue Company X or Industry Y than it is to admit to your own shortcomings.

I know there are exceptions; horrible, awful exceptions. Kids who have great parents who suffer abuse, bullying, whatever. Even in these situations though, should the parent not be sensitive enough to notice that something's the matter with their kid?

One thing about becoming a parent is you are no longer the most important person in your life. There are too many selfish, self-righteous cunts out there willing to blame anyone but themselves for their kid's fuckups. I'm writing this as a parent, so I know I'm laying myself open to criticism from every other parent. "Your kids, wait til they hit their teens" and all that shit. Fair enough. I know it's not going to be a bed of roses. But one thing I will not fucking do is shirk my responsibilities and try to blame some other cunt, or cunts, for my own failings. Getting back to the source of my rant, if my kid is playing video games for ten hours a day, then I will get them out of the house, I will get them involved with other people, I will help them to participate in things, even though it's easier not to. And they will thank me one day.

It's lazy parenting, pure and fucking simple. The kid's in his room, quiet, not bothering anyone. Therefore he must be ok, right? Right?


Get off your fucking arses, parents. Stop taking the easy way out - show an interest in your kids. I know I sound hopelessly naive, I'm laughing at myself while writing this, but fuck it, and fuck you if you wouldn't even give it a chance.

Anyway, what was I on about? Oh yeah, I like GTA.

Update: I wrote this in a feverish flurry of anger, and don't like the way I've put some of it. I know it comes across as a bit simplistic in parts, and I'd like to put in a bit about phenotype and genotype, but I can't be arsed. So there you go.


freshairlover blathered this crap:

I agree with everything you say. My mom used to say that she would get suspicious when my sister and I were too quiet.

jali blathered this crap:

Play is play whether it's using Legos or the hand-eye coordination of video games. I understood the difference between a fairy tale and reality as a child - our kids are just a s smart when it comes to the games they play. I don't think children should be unsupervised for any long period of time - that's where the trouble lies - parents allowing TV, videos, computers and games to substitute for quality time spent with the adults in their lives.

Old Knudsen blathered this crap:

If only my parents hugged me more, I wouldn't of turned out like this, I blame the bloody kids, all that "wah wah wah I'm a little baby I can't get a job", makes me sick.

emma blathered this crap:

I agree with what you're saying, parents are to blame. On the other hand, you don't have kids do you? Do you know what a fucking relief it is when they are in their rooms 'quiet, not bothering anyone.' It's bliss. Although thirteen hours is a bit much (JOKE)

emma blathered this crap:

okay, so I see you have an eleven week year old...still I don't think you can appreciate the heavenly sense of bliss that overcomes one when the kiddos are eventually in their rooms (I have two angels who are usually ripping each other to shreds, I know, lazy parenting...)

Kav blathered this crap:

Emma: Cheers for stopping by. I have two kids, one's two. I fully appreciate what you're saying - the main point of that meandering rant was that parents need to be held accountable for their kids' actions, not society. I breathe a sigh of relief every evening when mine are in bed, and I think most parents feel the same - it's only normal, and I wouldn't call it lazy parenting. There are some parents though, who never bother making the effort to do things with their kids, and it's that that annoys me.

Devin blathered this crap:

We have three boys (3,2 and 7 weeks) and it's a sweet moment when 2 out of the 3 go to sleep.Having said that it's a sweeter one when they're hopping all over you at 5 am yelling at you that "It's a sunny day..Get UP!!!" It's busy,hectic and often stressful but it's a laugh and a half.We might be going about it arseways but we organise our work schedules around them.They are never left with a sitter or with daycare(no fucking way in hell) and in a pinch we have Herself's parents nearby.We've also banned TV outright and are slowly weeding out the shit toys and games.It's tough alright because in the past I'd think nothing of plonking them in front of the telly while I got the dinner on.Now I have them in the kitchen "helping" and we end up with interesting meals.Still if that's all I have to complain about I've got it good.In fact I wasn't really complaining..what the fuck was I trying to say?

Conan Drumm blathered this crap:

"..they will thank me one day"... all us parents would like to think so, but since it's what they got coming to them why should they thank us?
As for the parental responsibility, yup, with you there.. kids playing slaughtermobile (or whatever it's called) all day will grow up to be genius techbots with no social skills and fantastic salaries... an appalling vista [and other similar clich├ęs!]

Fat Sparrow blathered this crap:

I'm ready to sell mine on eBay. I heard white kids fetch good money, no matter what Angelina Jolie and Madonna think.

The teenager will be off to the grandparent's house for the weekend, and I tried to get my Mom to take the toddler too, but Mom just laughed. I guess I shouldn't have told her that he's possessed. Damn.

duckie blathered this crap:

i'm with you 100%. parents have to take responsib ility for the actions of their kids. Those Columbine kids? Their parents should be in jail for having their heads so far up their asses that they couldn't see their kids were heading for trouble.

if my kids are playing any video games it 'cause I'm playing with them. and it's usually pac-man or dig dug. nothing realistic or violent. my kids would rather play outside on their bikes than anything else anyway.